10 Hilarious Things You’ll See In Flåm & What You Can Do About It

by Jyo

It’s a little hard to talk about Norway, without talking about Flåm.

Nestled between steep mountains, meandering waterfalls & dotted with tiny villages, this spectacular setting is home to Aurlandsfjord. It’s also home to Flamsbana Railway, named by Lonely Planet as the “world’s most incredible train journey”. My love for Flåm is because it’s gateway to the magnificent Unesco-heritage Nærøyfjord.

There’s just one teeny tiny problem, see, the word’s out. So Flåm is notoriously PACKED with visitors from all over the world.

You’ll see tourists perching precariously, while taking photos of fire hydrants. Selfie stick knockouts are a looming hazard. You might also catch yourself in a crossfire, between people frantically waving to friends (who don’t like to be photographed) to GET IN THE PICTURE ALREADY, JEN!! In this tourist terrorism, it’s easy to lose sight of all that Mojo.

Here are 10 hilarious things you’ll encounter & a game plan to find Mojo.

1. On the Flamsbana Railway….
You’ll witness a papparazzi fest.

Tourist hijacking is at an all time high on this train ride. People pour from one side of the train to the other, with audible “oohs” & “aahs”. I found it incredibly hard to catch a view of anything on the one way ride.

What You Can Do
Book a round-trip online! Most folks leave at Myrdal. By doing the round trip, you can see views on both sides of the train. Definitely step out to see the super cheesy “fairy” dance to Euro-pop music by the Kjosfossen waterfall! It’s so bad, it’s good.
Also peak times are 11 AM and 3 PM, if possible try to take the earlier train ride to minimize Paparazzi fest.

Flamsbana Railway

2. On the Nærøyfjord cruise…
You’ll See Tourists getting super excited about this …..

Feeding the seagulls. Yes, apparently tourists see seagulls on a cruise and lose their marbles. I saw tourists come prepared with bags of breadcrumbs to this end. It probably started with someone showing off “epic seagull feeding photos from my vacation” to a friend, and before you know it, it leads to a pandemic of tourists trying to feed seagulls on a cruise, of a Unesco heritage fjord.

What You Can Do
Shift to the upper/lower deck or even boat interior & get a load of this.

naeroyfjord

3. On the Nærøyfjord cruise…
You’ll hear folks express themselves very creatively.

I heard folks break out into songs in exotic foreign languages, because they were so moved. I also witnessed heated debates on Brexit & American politics. Teenagers were playing Justin Bieber on speaker phones; others face-timing with relatives, “Guess where I’m calling from? No, guess!! No, guess again!!”

What you can do
Reply loudly on their behalf: “She’s calling from NæRøYFJORD! These fjords aren’t going to sightsee themselves! Buh-bye!!” & go speechless over this view.

naeroyfjord

4. On the Nærøyfjord cruise…
You’ll hear angry & impatient banging on toilet doors.

VERY URGENT & LOUD DOOR BANGING. I have never in my life encountered such angry, loud, critical door banging, screaming to wrap it up! It got me wondering, what exactly did some of these tourists eat? How much water did they drink exactly? It had me giggling in splits!

What you can do
Enjoy this view when you have the place to yourself. And the corresponding reading material

I need this view from my Home Loo...
I need this view from my Home Loo
Instruction Manual on how to use a toilet IN CASE YOU GET CONFUSED

Instruction Manual on how to use a toilet IN CASE YOU GET CONFUSED. Note the important placement of “X”. Helpful to face the correct side. It also makes you wonder, what on earth happened, for the cruise folks to say to themselves, “Dammit!! This has happened too many time, folks, what we need is a manual.”

5. On the Nærøyfjord cruise…
You’ll See a stampede out of the boat (turn up volume on the video)

What you can do
Get a round-trip ticket! Many only do the cruise one-way, from Flåm to Gudvangen. I strongly recommend the round-trip, the way back was super serene & I even made friends with the staff!

Naeroyfjord

6. In Gudvangen…
You’ll See everyone run towards the souvenir store as if the horsemen of the apocalypse are chasing them & it’s the only place left to hide.

I would also probably run to the closest souvenir store if I was being chased. It might seem like a counter intuitive strategy, but you can’t find me in a pile of souvenir teddy bears! I would advise if souvenirs are what tickle your fancy (I *love* souvenirs from travels), the shop in Flåm is bigger & better.

What you can do
Grab a snack from the Viking themed cafe & chill. No creepy apocalyptic horsemen here, just ex-Vikings.

Gudvangen

7. Biking By the Rallarvegen
There will be a ton of drivers & walkers, not heeding attention.

If you love to bike, the downhill ride from Finse to Flåm is excellent! But everyone will be super distracted with the scenery, so drive or bike with caution.

What You Can Do
You’ll see so many elated faces & in turn, be one of them. One of my favorite memories is of a stranger who was ecstatic & looked jolted with happiness. It was hilarious and endearing as we caught his face from the parking lot, he looked like he won the lottery. Seeing him beam with happiness, I couldn’t help but burst out into a huge smile myself. Years later, I remember this stranger’s expression so vividly, and it still makes me happy. I believe true happiness is infectious.

flam

8. Hiking in Peaceful Aurland
You’ll encounter steep roads & hair-pin bends

Many break a sweat on the beautiful hike from Flåm to Aurland or get super nervous about the drive on hair-pin bends. At Stegastein Point, everyone freaks out over the edge of a bridge, daring themselves to peer over the depths below.

What You Can Do
Totally be one of them.

Stegastein Viewpoint

9. Kayaking on Nærøyfjord
You’ll See a lot of waves from incoming boats & cruise ships.

What You Can Do
Fjord Kayaking is safe, the water just bobs from one corner to the other, and you can even take guided trips to kayak along portions of Nærøyfjord. 2 places I recommend are Flåm Marina or Gudvangen Fjordtell for rentals. If speed is what you crave, I recommend a Fjord Safari, aka Speedboat tours.

naeroyfjord

10. Across town
You’ll See tourists stoked over Farm visits & Brown Cheese

What You Can Do
Oh the hype is real. Reserve a farm lunch & tour (Otternes farm is a popular choice) or head into nearby villages, like Undredal. Norwegian brown cheese is DIVINE — salty, sweet, caramelly perfection. My only regret is not carrying Nutella with me to dunk it in. Sweet heaven, I am drooling just thinking about it.

Undredal

On the drive from Flåm to Undredal

Drive from Flam to Undredal

Despite the volume of tourists, it will do little to diminish the magic of Flam. Go on and brave the tourists boldly, in this entry to Fjord country in Norway.

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